Shoot Your Shot

The phrase “shoot your shot’’ is used by many people, especially late millennials or early Gen Zers. It means to have the audacity to do something that might not always end in your favor. In terms of dating, it refers to pursuing someone who you’re interested in knowing there is a chance that you will be turned down. 

A lot of people, especially guys, are scared to talk to the person who they have romantic interest in because of the fear of being rejected. This is completely understandable. Who enjoys getting rejected repeatedly? Who likes having the mindset that they’re incompetent and not good enough for another person? Of course, no one likes to get rejected or feel like they’re not worthy of another person. But the thing is that we all must take some risk even though it might seem like the scariest thing at that moment. 

Let’s pretend you’re a soccer player. In order for your team to be victorious, you must score more goals than the other team. You can pass the ball all you want, left to right, but if you don’t take the shots, you will never score. Worse yet, there are other players on the other team trying to score as well. With that analogy in mind, let’s apply it to dating. Chances are that you are not the only person who has a romantic interest in your crush. There are probably one, two, or three other singles who are interested as well. If you continue to overthink and second guess yourself, you will not be willing and ready to take the risk when the opportunity presents itself. And you may miss your chance, leaving you with feelings of regret and heartache. Sadly, that is the harsh reality. 

We, as human beings, can be shy and nervous – which is completely understandable. We are scared to get out of their comfort zone, but there are some benefits to shooting your shot. It can help you become more confident despite the outcome. Look at this scenario: Sean is a shy guy who likes Alice, a coworker who he has spoken to a few times about general stuff. He has wanted to ask her out for a while, but he keeps overthinking and is fearful of rejection. One day, he decides enough is enough, and he is going to talk to Alice. He tells himself, “Whatever happens, happens.” He makes the first move and they have a good conversation; he even makes her laugh. Before they both go their separate ways, he asks her out. She says, “I’m sorry, but I do not feel the same way.” Sean replies with a nonchalant “no problem.” On Sean’s walk out of the office, he is not upset that Alice turned him down. In fact, he has a feeling of relief that he has gotten something off his chest. He thinks to himself that asking Alice out and getting turned down was not so bad after all. Yeah, he didn’t get to go out with her, but that experience helped him to become more confident.

So remember, confidence is attractive. View yourself as a leader and others will be drawn to you. Don’t overthink and second guess yourself – it will only decrease your confidence. And last but not least, always shoot your shot.